Ah mid-February, too late for awards season and too early for the summer blockbuster. So instead this week we’re left with an awkward smorgasbord of re-releases, half term fodder and studio leftovers, AKA awards friendly pics that were overlooked in the run up.
David Cronenberg’s latest pic A Dangerous Method has garnered just about as much press for its spanking scenes as anything else, which is surprising seeing as it boasts a delectable cast including hottest actor in the world right now™ Michael Fassbender, veritable hunk Viggo Mortensen and the not-unpretty Keira Knightley as psychological triumvirate Carl Jung, Sigmund Freud and Sabina Speilrein. Cronenberg’s pic charts the intense relationship that develops the heavyweight analysts as they treat difficult patient Speilrein, with love and professional tensions further complicating matters. Oh and did I mention there’s some spanking? Yes, yes I did.
Next up and guaranteed to have half-termers salivating into their Coco Pops and begging mum for a shilling is The Muppets. It’s been 12 long years since Kermit, Miss Piggy, Gonzo et al graced the big screen, so this Jason Segel penned tale of the Muppets quest to save the Muppet Theatre from demolition is not before time. Segel is joined onscreen by Amy Adams and Chris Cooper, but this one belongs to Jim Henson’s charming creations that dazzle in this magical musical.
Up against Fozzie and Animal for the teen dollar is the Daniel Radcliffe vehicle The Woman in Black. This is a moody, atmospheric and very scary ghost story which will satisfy Hammer horror vets just as much as Potter uberfans keen to see our Dan branching out from his supernatural cinematic roots. Oh wait…
In perhaps the most telling indication yet as to the state of the film industry, this week sees Casablanca get a 70th anniversary re-release, just as George Lucas unfathomably inflicts a retro-fitted 3D version of The Phantom Menace on audiences.
Whilst one is a timeless, epic, perfect classic tale of love and honour, the other is a shambolic mess of a disaster that deigned to bore us all the first time around with yawn inducing nonsense about taxation and trade routes. No amount of 3D, or anything else for that matter, could salvage that hopeless mess of a movie. Avoid…
crash/burn 
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